The best video game commercials of the 1980s are the purest dose of nostalgia you’ll experience today.
They are selling you an idea of what the game is, rather than the reality.
Back in the 80s, we didnt have that option.
Yes, there were good games out there, but advertising was more of a challenge.
Here are some that truly stand out from our most fool-pitying decade.
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The lesson to be learned here is to never play an LJN video game.
You might destroy the fabric of reality and you might get a milkshake thrown onto the floor.
Also, theyrejust bad in general.
But also, one of them is a 13-year-old Jack Black.
Getting to do the bonus round ofNick Arcadejust seemed like the coolest thing imaginable.
The commercial for AtarisTunnel Runnerreally brings that imagination, albeit in a borderline nightmarish way.
They already had a ton of games ready to go, and countless more coming out.
They didnt need commercials forSuper Mario Bros.orDuck Hunt.
All they had to do was say, Look at all this shit we have!
ROB was hatched from a celestial egg.
Playing these games caused a house to fly into space.
Its as if our protagonists are too busy playingKung Futo be worried about an alien xenomorph on the loose.
I cant blame them, considering how sweet that setup is.
I feel like Im missing a lot of context here, but maybe its better that way.
Otherwise, its a solid way to talk up the new handheld and what it can do.
Perhaps even a robot man in the post-apocalypse!
The voice and body language are completely on point.
This game does not deserve a version of the Green Goblin this good.
Thats not to say the NYC rooftop and Spider-Man arent impressive in their own right.
The only problem is when he dramatically asks if this is too much action for Spider-Man to handle.
At this point, he sounds like Deadpool sarcastically harping on the product.
This one really stands out because of the brilliant use of the Master Systems box design.
Though nothing beats the serotonin that comes from when they show off all the games in their library.
To advertise this, they came up with their own mascot named Mr. Arcade.
Dragon Warrior is an Epic Adventure
RPGs were brand new to North America.
This was unmanned territory.
How do you advertise a brand-new throw in of game to an audience that might not truly understand it?
Never thought Id say this, but Ill take the real horse over the CGI dragon.
Need to Stick Together or Else!
Boy, do I wish the Bob Hoskins flick looked more like this.
Mike Tysons Punch-Out!!
Live from Tysons Evil Lair
Mike Tysons star in the 80s was such a unique experience.
The ad really steps it up with the insane monitor layout.
From the very brief flashes of gameplay, there is not much to this game.
Its incredibly basic and lifeless.
Thankfully for Activision, they hired two guys who could sell the bejesus out of this product.
The clerk is actor/comedian Howard Mann while the customer is none other than a Groundlings-era Phil Hartman.
Watching this young, pre-SNLHartman go full-on Incredible Hulk overIce Hockeywhile Mann eggs him on is addicting to watch.
is just plain beautiful.
I have SO MANY QUESTIONS.
Is this announcer God?
Is God punishing this nerdy executive and his family?
I only have two questions.
The son has kind of a podracing Anakin Skywalker vibe to him.
As reality keeps shifting into gameplay (good transitions!
), the family members gradually crash and presumably die.
Theres a guy getting dragged into his TV and turned into a Human CentI mean, a half-man/half-centipede.
It feels a lot like Cronenberg meets the alternate ending fromLittle Shop of Horrors.
This is all so much better thanthe laterCentipedecommercial wed get, filled with cheesy rapping.
I want my MTV body horror!
