Taking the blame for prices.
And, er, people failing to use the loo.
What cinema staff hate about cinema audiences.
Cinemas continue to come in for no end of criticism.
Quite a lot, as it happens.
We invited cinema staff under an agreement of anonymity to get in touch and tell us their horror stories.
Theyre the ones who want to watch the film.
Yet as with any job, there are exceptions.
Weve had two separate people get in touch with us on this.
It felt warm, wrote C. Gave it a smell.
Mind you, V can beat that.
But it gets worse…
Ah.
Like most such things, theres a downside.
In this case, parents forgetting to take the nappies of their children away with them.
The record for this?
As one Tweeter told us, over 30.
This was after a parents and babies screening, something that seems to be particularly dreaded by cinema staff.
A common problem is people buying the huge sized drinks that cinema concessions stands offer and not finishing them.
Half-filled tubs of Pepsi cant go in the bin, as they leak everywhere.
In short, lots of people treat the cinema in a way they wouldnt treat any other public place.
Here are but a couple of tales we were told.
An amorous middle aged couple had gotten stark-bollock-naked for some kind of rumpy pumpy shenanigans.
He continued the story.
I averted my eyes from the sweaty mingingness and shouted, er… when youre ready'.
Said couple pegged it out the fire escape, rather than facing the awaiting staff in the foyer.
They clearly got over excited by the wonders ofVertical Limit, noted our informant.
To each their own I suppose.
Perhaps the saddest tale along these lines we heard was this one.
Thats what its come to.
People care so little about the cinema as an experience that our job is essentially damage limitation.
Apparently there were tissues.
Over the last 10 to 15 years, people care less and less.
And then the staff get the blame.
He does point out that he loves his job.
I worked in a cinema whenThe Flintstonescame out, Jon told us.
If youve never mopped up pick & mix sick on a Saturday morning, youve not lived.
In fact, they agree with you more than you think.
We know that your ticket/food/sweets/popcorn/hot-dog/three pieces of picknmix were expensive, G told us.
But we cant do anything about it!
Lots of people echoed the same thought.
They seem logical to us.
Dont let your kids put their hands in the pic & mix.
We like those rules.
Several reports of this.
Humans clean those seats.
yo dont, begged several cinema workers who got in touch with us.
Handy hint to those trying this: you will not get a refund.
Bit harsh this one.
The chances are, unless its Marvel, there isnt.
That said, some people ourselves included actually like reading the credits.
This happens a lot, it seems.
Again, they did not get their money back.
On one particularly memorable occasioan, a couple tried to buy a family ticket forSnakes On A Plane.
The poor children will never appreciate what they missed out on.
The specific example we were given?
A mother on mother punch-up.
It took place during a midday showing ofMonsters Inc, leaving dozens of kids crying around them.
We dont say this lightly: wed rather they played on their phone.
Unfortunately, theres more…
This is where things take an even more uncomfortable turn: when cinema staff are threatened with violence.
The police were called.
The manager was assaulted because the customer concerned resented paying an extra 50p.
Most incidents dont result in the police being called, though.
I know two members of staff who had large drinks thrown at them, V told us.
If seeing it is bad, just imagine having to clean it.
In a large tub there are a thousand calories!
Why does everyone buy it?!
It is literally popped corn with a ton of sugar or salt on!
wrote one person).
Cleaning up popcorn is clearly one of the worst parts of the job.
Bottom line: there are bins.
yo put your stuff in them.
