If you absolutely had to be haunted, who’d be your choice of ghostly visitation?
There are certainly plenty of movie and TV ghosts wedontwant haunting us.
The murderous ones boxed up in the glass house ofTHIR13EN Ghosts?
Hes a friggin liability.Sleepy Hollows Headless Horseman?
And god forbidPipesever gets past the door.
There are, however, notable pop culture ghosts that wouldnt make our lives considerably worse.
Perhaps theyre genuinely helpful, and wouldnt be too much of a bother to have hanging around.
Or, and we dont mean to lower the tone, maybe theyre just really, really hot.
In the end, there are worse spirits to be haunted by than the Doctor.
And where else are you gonna find a spirit with such hilariously furious eyebrows?
As his name suggests, this specter is largely concerned with boxes … like literally cardboard boxes.
Danny Phantom and is just as routinely dispatched.
And you know what?
I love him for it.
Choosing a ghost that is technically an antagonist to haunt me seems like a poor decision on its face.
But the Box Ghost is so pitiful that theres really no threat of harm.
In fact, I bet we would find that we have a lot in common.
Like him, I hail from the Midwest (though dont quite have hisFargo-ian patois) and enjoy boxes.
Honestly, having a friend that could summon cardboard boxes whenever needed would be tremendously useful.
Never fear, the Box Ghost and I have you covered.
Even still, I dont need any late-night weeping or attention-grabbing destruction in my day-to-day life.
Its a Tuesday, not an episode ofReal Housewives.
Thats why the obvious choice has to be Malcolm Crowe fromThe Sixth Sense.
The daughter in question, Murphy Cooper, believes a specter in the films early stages is haunting her.
This is the ideal phantom situation for a multitude of reasons.
Second, you have the pleasure of partaking in the universes onlyMorse code puzzle boxstretching across time and space.
Its like your daily crossword for physicists.
Once Jacob Marley and his clanking hell-chains are out of the way, its a Christmasapalooza.
The clock strikes one and hello!
What was that again about needing severe moral instruction?
To be fair, DC never really took advantage of the couple in their ghostly incarnation.
So why Pat Butcher (Jim Howick,Sex Education) over all the other spooks?
Because he has the biggest heart by miles.
Kitty is sweet but her clinginess would grate on me.
Julian is a helmet.
The Captains a bossypants.
Fanny is the second mother I definitely dont need.
Thomas is a wet blanket.
Robin is so scruffy I feel like I can smell him through the TV.
And Mary has that burnt toast smell I could do without.
But Pat is a fellow mega-nerd.
King of the dad jokes.
And his interests fall squarely in the pastimes of the 1980s, which is a-ok with me.
We can watchTop Guntogether.
We can play Twister.
We can call each other wazzocks.
There are literally no downsides.
Er, did I mention how handsome he is?
And I didnt even mention the potters wheel once!
I LOVE Betelguese, the manand the film.
He is funny and rude and disgusting and a little bit sexy (I know thats wrong).
They arent the brightest, its true, but they seem like really nice lads.
He isnt even called Slimer in the original 1984Ghostbustersclassic directed by Ivan Reitman.
Hes just referred to as an ugly little spud by Dan Aykroyd.
